Muddled.
I...
Don't know.
Why my mind is convoluted, clouded, and frustrated.
I usually know exactly what to say and how to figure things out.
I can do it!
I can do it, right?
If I want it, I can do it.
Manifestation... This concept that brings me all the power and taps into the universe.
Sure, it works for some but I have had no such luck.
I have been intentional.
I have fought for it.
I have scratched and clawed to be here.
In this country.
And do it the right way.
My mind races.
My heart beats at paces that I am not familiar with.
I try and try to be the best me I can be...
To live according to the code I've set for myself in line with my God's word.
I am alone. I am afraid. I am unprotected.
These lies.
Left to fester for so long.
Caused the clouds to grow larger and darker.
No longer.
Clarity is not forever.
My artistry demands returning to a state of confusion.
But... I am not afraid.
I sit in the darkness and the confusion, knowing that it's time is nigh and it has been defeated already.
Yours faithfully,
Qavah.
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