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Writer's pictureSam John

NEW

A New Beginning.


An unexpected chapter.


What felt like derailment...


Is starting to feel like a new dream.


A new journey.



For the first time in my life, I feel settled.


I have a home.


I have a job.


I have a love for myself that I never had before.


For the the first time, my heart feels held.


By me and by my God.



It is strange how pain can result in such joy. Such progress.


How each step of a dream...


Of a journey.


Could somehow be the best thing for me.



How every time I look back at the darkness... and ahead at the darkness still to come, I realize that it all serves a purpose.



A purpose. On purpose. With purpose.


To remind me of who I am.


A dreamer of the day.


A lover of God and of people... and finally of myself.



Taking it one day at a time.


With a renewed passion to reflect the love I crave from others back onto myself.


To make me feel like I matter.


Like I can be who I want to be.


Even if not one other person sees it or recognizes it.


To free me from the bitterness and the comparison.


To see the success of someone I don't believe deserves it and allow myself to rest in contentment, rejoicing, and the firm belief that what is meant for me will never pass me.



This peace I've found.


Its special. Its unique. Its strange.



I never thought this is where I'd end up.


But while I'm here, I will do what I always do.


Go above and beyond towards levels of unprecedented greatness.



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